i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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