I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
