Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
