I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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