I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
You smell like stripper and shame
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
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