as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
