i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
