tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
