I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
