bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Randomize
