I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
