I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
