Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
this hospital has no fireball
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize