Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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