so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
