sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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