i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
