Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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