i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
