Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Are my feet made of real feet?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
