Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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