its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
