I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I don't want my vagina anymore.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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