How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
