Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
