I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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