Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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