What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
