that's an acceptable place to lick
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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