YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
