i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Randomize
