idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
