Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?

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(831): View more from California

i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3

Fav 22 5879 963
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?

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(630): View more from Illinois

We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.

Fav 5 4255 1247
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(661): View more from California

Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.

Fav 5 1145 2580
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(480): View more from Arizona

We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.

Fav 5 3010 841
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(402): View more from Nebraska

I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha

Fav 9 1569 705
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.

Fav 3 617 459
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(309): View more from Illinois

Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.

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