it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
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