she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
