what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
