i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
