Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
