omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
