I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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