no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
