So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
