I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
