Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
he just fucked me for my cheese.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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