tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
She announced her abortion via fbk
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
