We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
either way he was missing a nipple.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
