its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
