Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
