how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
