Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
he puts the penis in happiness.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
